im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
It's no shave November. This is our time.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Randomize