ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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