Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
