Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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