I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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