8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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