Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
