Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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