She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
