We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
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