either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
