You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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