so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
