...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
You're like the curious george of whores
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
