apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
