it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
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