It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
