I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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