I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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