is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
