absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
