Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
