No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
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