come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Randomize
