We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
