That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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