Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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