You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
