In the future we'll all be gay
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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