Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
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