I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
