11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
