do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
