woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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