What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
