why didn't you poke me back
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
