i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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