I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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