wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
