I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Randomize
