i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
