Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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