He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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