Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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