i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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