On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
