Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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