If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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