Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
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