wakey wakey hands off snakey
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
