I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
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